I Lost My Mind

One of my blogging favs, Martini's or Diaper Genies did a post that reminded me of an experience I had so of course I had to share with you all. You lucky devils you.

So, a few years ago I got the totally awesome idea of trying to get healthier and drop a few pounds so I decided to join a gym. Oh, it was great in the beginning. They enticed me with a personal trainer and my choice of fitness classes. I was in heaven. I was going to be a stunner if it was going to kill me.

After a couple months the shininess of the gym experience kinda got lost somewhere. My time with the personal trainer had run out. I got bored with running to the gym almost every night after work by myself. After 2 months my body should have been all that by then, right? I can’t motivate myself to do stuff like this. I need someone there to kick my ass into gear. I was dating The Analyst back then and he tried to motivate me but that was a bust when my buddy passes ran out and he could no longer go with me to the gym…for free.

So I decided to take one of the classes they offer. Oh yeah! I found my mojo again.

I got to the gym promptly at 6:3o pm, the appointed start time. The class was called Body Pump and I was ready to pump my body into shape for the next hour. Shucks, I walk up stairs when given the opportunity and I’ve always fancied myself as a pretty good dancer so this class should be a piece of cake.

All of a sudden the instructor stands in front of the class and introduces herself and welcomes us to her class. She is a little bitty thing with a huge helping of energy. ‘Ok, this should be fun’ I thought to myself. The instructor walks over to the little stereo on her right and presses a button and the music starts blaring throughout the room. Aaaah, yes! This is what I need.

“Ok, Let’s reach……reach…reach….!” “Kick to the left four times then switch to the right and kick four times then repeat 100 times!”

Huh? What? This torture went on for about 7 minutes and I had finally had enough. I was about to call it quits when as she was making her perky ass around the room she stops in front of me and challenges me! “Come on! You can do it! Reach! Now kick! Good…Good!! Now punch six times!! Come on, you can do it! Go go!!!

All I kept thinking about as she was in my face was how much I wanted to punch HER. I was all like ‘Woman, don’t you see me sweating and panting and holding my side and chest in agony and you want me to GO GO!!?’ I said that to myself of course but I was one GO Go away from smacking her energetic ass.

I couldn’t let her see me give up so I pressed on. I was all ‘You are not going to defeat me!’

After about 10 more minutes I said ‘to hell with it’ and skulked out of the class holding my side, walked to my car and drove away never to return.

Who needs to be fit anyway?

Ask Tee

Alright my lovelies, you know what day it is! It's Wednesday so we have another installment of Ask Tee. Feel free to give your insight and thoughts on the readers question or my advice.

Letter #1

Dear Tee,

I have this coworker that I think is a little strange. She keeps trying to corner me and had this ultra personal conversation about her sex life and I DO NOT want to hear about it. We are not that close.

How in the world can I tell her without causing tension between us since we work closely together that I don't care about her sex life?

Signed,

Tanya

My Answer:

Dear Tanya,

Tanya, try subtly changing the subject when she tries to talk about her exploits. Cut the conversation short if you have too. Most people will eventually get the hint. That way there is no tension between you two.

If she is thick headed and just does not get it then an uncomfortable conversation may be unavoidable. Try pulling her to the side and simply say to her that you prefer to not talk about her sex life or you can always talk to her supervisor and have them subtly intervene.

Good Luck.

If you have a situation you need advice on, just click the graphic on the sidebar or go to ask.tee@hotmail.com.

I Blocked You!

So last week my cell phone buzzed indicating an email had arrived. I picked up the phone and opened my email folder and BAMM! There it was. A message from my ex husband! That's right, my ignorant ass ex husband.

He sent me a message via facebook a few months ago saying something to the effect that he liked my picture. I ignored him because I truly did not want him to think I wanted to be buddies with him and as a result send me a friend request. Hell no! So I ignored him. Take that asswipe!

Then fast forward to last week and there was yet another facebook message from him. What in the world is his problem? Dude,I ignored your first message why would you send me another message? This new one said something to the effect that he liked me smiling. Again, I ignored that message.

A business associate gave me a great bit of information this week, "Just block him." What!? You can ignore someone that was not a friend? Why didn't anyone tell me this before? I hold all of you personally responsible for holding this precious bit of information from me.

Later that evening when I got to my computer I did what I should have done ages ago...block his ass!! Yaaaayyyy boooyy! Boo ya! Now try to find me Mr. Jerkoff!

Ask Tee

Alright my lovelies, you know what day it is! It's Wednesday so we have another installment of Ask Tee. Feel free to give your insight and thoughts on the readers question or my advice.

Letter #1

Dear Tee,

I hope you can help me, my mother will be reading your response. I am 22 years old, in my last year of college and live at home with my parents. I love my parents I really do.

The problem is my mom. She still treats me as if I was 15. Whenever I go out I have to tell her where I'm going, with whom and when I will be back. I hate that.

She questions me about every little thing and it drives me up a wall. She constantly goes in my room and snoops around.

What should I do?

Signed,

Linda

My Answer:

Dear Linda,

Since you said your mother was going to read this I will direct my response to her.

Mom, I know that you love your daughter and she will always be your little girl. I get that, I truly do. And I also understand that she lives in your house and must follow your rules I get that as well. But mom, can you give Linda a little breathing room? She's an adult and a responsible one at that evidenced by her pending graduation.

You raised her well mom but you have to let her grow up and act as an adult. It's your job to raise her to be a productive, healthy member of society able to stand on her own two feet and it seems you have done that. Let her handle her business on her own and just fall back and be a safety net if she falls.

Your relationship will be much better if you do.

Good Luck.

If you have a situation you need advice on, just click the graphic on the sidebar or go to ask.tee@hotmail.com.

Craziness

Hello bloggy friends. I'm sorry I did not put up the latest installment of Ask Tee this week but things got a little crazy here at the ol' 9to5 so I didn't have time. I will assuredly get back to the business of posting an Ask Tee letter next week so please don't forget to submit your letters.

In the meanwhile, since I have a few minutes I will update you on my dating adventures as of late. A few weeks ago I meet this gentleman that contacted me through an online website. At first "glance" dude seemed OK. I was all 'let's see what he's about'. Anyway, we finally get around to exchanging phone numbers and he calls. His voice did not match his face at all. OK, no big deal. Moving on. So we mainly text after that first conversation because he was having problems with his cell phone. Basically he was on a prepaid phone and was running out of minutes and apparently didn't have the money to "reup" the phone. Oooookkkkkk.

Then after about a week of texting his phone loses juice all together and we have zero communication. Then he finds that he has a few extra minutes so he call me out of the blue. I ask him what he did for a living. He tells me that he is looking for his next venture. Of course I had a serious side-eye going on after that. It seems that he is one of these MLM (multi level marketing) junkies that is always looking for his next easy get rich quick opportunity and actually doesn't have a real 9to5. Ooookkkkkk. Then to top it off he tells me that the picture he displayed on his profile page was not even him. It was some random dude from I don't know where.

I also find out dude has no car and no intention of getting one, he has horrible credit, no money and is living with his girlfriend that he is really unhappy with and wishes he could get away from but because he has no money he is stuck.

Then New Years comes around the next week and he calls me from a pay phone downtown because he has no minutes on his phone again and states that he wants to come to my house that night, the day before New Years Eve, and spend the night until the next day after which I'll drop him off somewhere (remember, he has no car) so he can spend New Years Eve evening and New Years day with his girlfriend. Keep in mind that we have never laid eyes on each other.

Me thinks he's a keeper.

Do Most Men Really Desire Sex With A Man?

I’ve recently read a few blog posts, listened to a couple of radio broadcasts and even posted a letter from a reader in my Ask Tee feature all regarding the same subject; men secretly sleeping with other men.

I don’t have a problem with homosexuality. Hell, I would love to have a gay male best friend. I love the gays. My problem is when these men are married or otherwise in a committed relationship with women and have this secret life going on that involves sleeping with other men. From a woman’s standpoint this is absolutely disgusting. The level of betrayal by this behavior is gut wrenching.

Fellas, let me tell you just what we women experience when you engage in such behavior: we go through many, many sleepless nights crying so hard our eyes are painful and swollen and yet we can’t stop crying because the pain is so deep (just the mere mention of your name opens the flood gates), we wonder what we did to make you prefer a man to us, we wonder if we were ever good enough, we try our hardest to figure out what we did wrong.

Do these men really fully comprehend the destruction that this behavior leaves in its wake? Think about it. You vow to love, honor and protect this person. You let the person trust you with everything in them and you shatter that to smithereens.

Do these men feel guilty about what they have done? I fully believe that these men engage in this behavior and keep it a secret for very selfish reasons: ‘I love my wife and don’t want to lose her.’ ‘I will lose my job if I tell everyone how I really feel.’ ‘My friends and family will not accept me if I tell them what I’ve been up to.’ All very selfish reasons. You ultimately destroy your family and another person’s life and ability to ever fully trust again because you were afraid to come clean with your feelings to protect yourself.

With so many of these stories coming to light it makes me wonder, do most men have this desire to sleep with other men? Is it something that most men feel but only some have the guts to act on it? Are men such uber sexual creatures that this is somehow just another way to push the envelop even further?

What do you all think?

I...Can't....Breath!

I need to buy some new pants and some kick ass jeans but with my fat ass I opted not to go shopping. This was a painful decision as I heart shopping very much.

I figured if I am ever going to be able to purchase pants ever again I better get this stinkin gut under control so because of that I ordered the ab circle my friends! That's right! I ordered the ab circle so I can roll my fat ass into shape so that I can go shopping again.



Wish me luck! I'll be sure to give you regular updates.

Ask Tee

Alright my lovelies, you know what day it is! It's Wednesday so we have another installment of Ask Tee. Feel free to give your insight and thoughts on the readers question or my advice.

Letter #1

Dear Tee,

I have a best friend that I have been friends with for 5 years. We've had a great friendship over the years. The problem is lately when we go out she's been dressing really provocatively and it's embarrassing. The girl dresses like a $2 ho. She's trying to find a new boyfriend but she's going about it all wrong in my opinion.

I tried to tell her that she needs to step up her dressing and not be so revealing but its to no avail. I don't want to hang out with her anymore. What should I do? Should I have that uncomfortable breakup speech with her and tell her why I'm not hanging out with her anymore or should I just fade into the woodwork and disappear?

Signed,

Embarrassed

My Answer:

Dear Embarrassed,

I think out of respect for your 5 year friendship that you should respect her enough to tell her how you feel and let her know exactly why you are not going to hang out with her anymore. You can do it in any number of ways that feel comfortable to you, face to face, email, phone call/voicemail, a letter mailed to her house, etc.

Be tactful and understanding as to not put her on the offensive if possible.

Good Luck.

If you have a situation you need advice on, just click the graphic on the sidebar or go to ask.tee@hotmail.com.

How Do You Handle A Break Up?

We've all been there. Whether we are the dumpee or the dumper, we have all experienced the end of a relationship. The uncomfortable "It's not you it's me" conversation. The tears and pleas to stay together. It often times is quite messy. How do you handle the aftermath of a break up? Does it depend on how messy the break up is?

For me, it doesn't matter how amicable the break up is, after we are done, we are done. I don't want any phone calls or emails or any of that. Forget you even know my name when we break up. Especially if you broke up with me. I don't want to hear about your new woman and how great she is and how you are planning on marrying her. Yeah, that doesn't hurt much.

If I was the dumpee I still don't want to be friends with the guy because inevitably he will always think he can inch his way back in. Always. Uuuhhh, no. I don't want to be your friend.

So, what's your take on ending a relationship? Can you be friends or no?