Why Are You So Happy?

I have a Godson that is 22 years old. His mother and I have been friends since high school and graduated together. When he was born while she was in college we just knew he was going to be something special. The most adorable kid you’d ever want to see.

Fast forward 20 years and Houston we have a problem. It was brought to my attention a couple years ago that he was cross dressing. This kid feels he’s in the wrong body and should have been born a female. He stayed with me for a very short period 2 years ago when his parents kicked him out of the house for this behavior. It would have been nice if they had let me in on this before he moved in with me. I didn’t really know that he was going through this until I came home from work one day and he surprised me wearing a wig, lip gloss and a light blue woman’s tank top. He scared the bejeesus out of me.

During all this he had a girlfriend who was just as confused as he was. He made it known in no uncertain terms that he was going to have gender reassignment surgery as soon as he was financially able. This stupid girl still stuck by his side and supported him.

Anyway, fast forward 2 years later and he has another girlfriend but now his mother tells me he is expecting a child with this new girl. What the hell???!!

My girlfriend is so happy about this. Why? The kid has a little minimum wage job, can’t afford his own place, is unmarried and still has issues with his gender and sexual identity. Oh yeah, that’s a perfect situation to bring a kid into.

I wonder if my girl is happy about becoming a grandmother because she thinks this will “cure” him of wanting to be a woman and force him to lead a “normal” life. I wish they understood this boy is just masking who he really is for now.

What is going to happen to this girlfriend of his and their child when years down the road he “comes out” and decides he can no longer live a lie? Mark my words, I guarantee you this will happen.

Now he’s ruining two people’s lives unnecessarily. His parents should just accept him for who he really is.

Friendships

Are friendships like those you see on Friends and Sex and The City unrealistic? I was reading a post from a fellow blogger and she was bemoaning her lack of really close female relationships and how she so desired the same tight group of friends like Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda.

To be honest I was having the same thoughts at the time which is why this struck a cord with me. I too long for the closeness of these aforementioned women. Oddly enough, this blogger was not the first woman I've heard with this same plight/desire. I mean I do have girlfriends that I see but there is not that closeness that I am looking for. We are so different. I am more carefree and spontaneous and they are all very regimented and calculating and I would not dare talk to them about certain things. It gets frustrating at times.

Why is it that we seem to desire these girly relationships but they are so very difficult to obtain and hold on to? Is it even realistic to expect such a relationship?

Men, do you all find it easier in your male relationships? I know you guys don't have the same desires of closeness that we women long for but do you find it easier to bond with other men?

I think that one of the really exciting aspects of my eventual move to Atlanta is that I get to start all over again forging new relationships and with a fresh start. There is something very intoxicating about that.

Cousin Hector

I remember shortly after my divorce my fathers cousin Hector had come to visit us. Although my father had long passed on Hector and his family continued to keep in touch.

While during his visit my mother, Hector and I decided to go out and grab some dinner at a local restaurant. It was at this time good ol’ Hector decided to start questioning me about my failed marriage.

He asked me if I “had been close to a guy before”. I without thinking said “Sure. Not as close as my ex but close nonetheless.” I didn’t want him to think I had just jumped at the first guy that came along because that couldn’t be farther from the truth.

After pondering for several weeks on why he was in my business I began to wonder, “Was this fool asking me if I was a virgin when I got married? Right in front of my mother?”

The hell was his problem?

How Old Do I Look?

“Guess how old I am.” I hate those words. I am horrible at trying to guess a person’s age. I will never ask anyone to guess mine because if they tell me I look older then I am they will need an emergency extraction team to forcibly extract my foot from their ass. Just that simple.

When the Verizon FiOS guy came to hook me up several weeks ago we began a casual conversation, no big deal. During said conversation he asked how old he looked. I told him in his early 40’s sure that I was good because hell, he looked closer to 50. He then said “I get that all the time, I’m actually 35.”

Oops.

You Busted Yourself

If you are going to be sneaky and duplicitous in trying to gather evidence that your mate is cheating on you please by all means be smart about it.

Sure, most of us have at one time or other has suspected a mate of being less then faithful. We may have even rifled through their wallet or cell phone trying to find proof. No big deal. If, however, you are going to take this thing further then just some snooping then you better darn sight cover your tracks.

Case in point, many years ago my aunt was married to a rather interesting gentleman to say the least. They had their ups and downs like any couple. They’d argue and fight then make up again like everyone else.

For some strange reason my aunts husband had it in his mind that his wife was cheating. One day my aunt was putsing around the house and stumbled across a recording device. Hmmmmm. She pressed the play button and realized that her wonderful husband was recording her every phone conversation. She was livid but kept listening.

Lo and behold she came across a conversation he was having with HIS girlfriend. She listened some more and heard a few more conversations he had with his girlfriend.

Dude was so cocky and sure that he wouldn’t get caught that he was busted talking to his girlfriend using the same tapped phone he rigged to catch his wife!

Can you say dumb ass?

Love Don't Live Here Anymore

I was reading my blogging pal's post the other day, Falling Out Of Love , and it got me to thinking about how I handle break ups.

Karen, in her post, says she holds on for dear life. I, on the other hand, tend to walk away and not look back.

I noticed that after the demise of every relationship, once it's over...it's over. I don't want to be friends, hell I don't even want to talk to you anymore. What would be the purpose? I have enough friends and I don't necessarily need to add you.

Part of the reason is quite selfish I might add. I don't want to go through hearing about his next girlfriend or seeing them out. For that main reason I just cut off all ties.

It's also a respect thing because if I am in a new relationship I don't need some ex hanging around and I'd expect that same level of respect from my s/o.

How do you handle the demise of a relationship? Do you hold on until you can't any more? Do you still attempt a friendship? Do you just cut all ties and move on quickly like me?

Don't Drink and Walk

I trust everyone had an enjoyable or at least quiet New Years. I slept through it which was fine with me actually.

Friday night however was a different story. A friend of my boss's whom I've become friendly with called to ask me out for a drink to hang out a bit. I wasn't doing anything so I agreed to go.

When I arrived at the restaurant's bar I noticed that Dee was sitting next to some random dude. I didn't think anything of it and proceeded to greet her and take my seat.

All through out the evening random dude kept annoying the hell out of Dee. To know Dee is to know that she is VERY outspoken and pretty aggressive. She and this dude kept arguing back and forth. It was actually pretty hilarious. He'd tell her to chill out and she'd tell him to stop saying that. He'd touch her shoulder and she'd tell him to not touch her.

After about 45 minutes of this I simply turned to Dee and said, "You guys should get married." In her most disgusted voice possible she said "Hell no!"

After another 30 minutes of this it was pretty obvious random dude was totally drunk. He proceeds to leave the bar. According to Pat the bartender random dude only lives a few feet from the restaurant so he's fine.

After he leaves Dee and I sit there for a few more minutes then decide to go elsewhere for the evening so as we are driving up the street we notice random dude walking in the opposite direction of where Pat said he lived and in the middle of the street just flailing his arms about like some lunatic. I looked at him and said "What the hell?" Dude was gone. Dee got on her phone to call Pat to tell him what we saw and his response was that "..he'll be just fine. I'll call his mother." I was like 'cool'. Apparently you shouldn't drink and walk either.

Just as a side note, Pat made me the best Apple Caramel Martini I have ever had in my life and I think I want to have his children.