I Don't Need To Have Kids To Understand

This post might make some of you parents angry with me and for that I apologize but I have to get this off of my chest. Recently, I've had two separate conversations with two different people about the same subject. Kids, and people who have kids and think you have to be a parent to understand what it is like to raise a kid. I don't have to walk through fire to know that it is hot and burns.

It does not take a rocket scientist to know what the right thing is and the wrong thing is to tell a child. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to know what's healthy for a child and what's not. There are many many psychologists and therapists that have great insight on the subject and have never given birth to a child.

I don't have a child of my own but I am fully aware of how strong a parent's love is for their child. I totally get that you would walk through fire and give your own life for your child, I get that. I truly do. Do not tell me just because I don't have a child I don't understand how difficult it is to raise a child. Hello! Do I live in a vacuum? I know what the cost of living is. I know the cost of clothing and feeding and sheltering a child. I know how it may be difficult to scrap together extra funds for the all important extra curricular activities that are so important to the development of every child. I get that. I also know how hard it is for you when your child is bratty, belligerent, and confrontational. You try your best to understand why this child is acting this way and attempt to figure out how to best get through to them. I understand how difficult this is.

I understand how hard it is for you when you do all you think you could have done for the child and they still end up being a real shit or even strung out on drugs. I understand how hard it is for you to execute a little tough love when needed and force the child to straighten up by making them stand on their own two feet without you as a safety net. I know how hard that is and for some of you I know it is impossible. I get it.

What's really great from my perspective is that I am totally unbiased in the situation which is great when it comes to trying to figure out the best solution for a really tough situation. Parents are often so weighed down by emotion that they can not see to do what is the best for a given situation or be completely objective. I can. Let me give you an example, your 19 year old child has been on drugs for the last 8 years. You've tried everything you can to get through to them but nothing has worked. You've forced them into rehab but to no avail. They can not hold down a job and is stealing from you to support their habit. Your parental instinct is to keep trying and hoping that maybe they will straighten up because you love them so much and that is your baby. You know in your heart that you are enabling them but you can't bring yourself to put the child out in order to make them accountable for their own actions. I know how hard that is but that tough love is necessary. You are not doing them any favors by allowing them to continue this behavior. As long as you keep supporting them they have no reason to change. Think about it, you supply their food and shelter and cash from the sale of the stolen goods from your house or purse. What possible reason do they have for wanting to change that behavior?

I don't have to be a parent to know that when you are divorced it is NEVER OK to talk bad about the other parent in front of that child. Never. No matter how difficult it is, you should always hold your tongue and allow the child to develop his or her own relationship with that parent. They will figure out who their mother or father is all on their own.

So please parents, do not discard someone by saying "Oh you don't have a child so you don't understand." because that won't fly anymore. It does not take a genius to know just how difficult it is to raise a child. After all, we've all been children ourselves.

I Think I Might Like Coming To Work..Maybe

So, today I was taking my lunch planted in front of the TV watching my soaps which is my daily routine here at work. BTW, they CAN NOT kill Stehpanie off of Bold and the Beautiful. Not gonna happen. I will stage a revolt unlike any other they've seen. Oh yeah, back to my point...

As I was sitting in the lunch room minding my own business guess what I saw stroll in? Go ahead...guess. Something this company is seriously lacking. Eye candy!!! Yes!! Finally! This very attractive man waltzes in and I'm all like, "Helllooooooo!" and he's all "Hi." Ok Whatevs.

Hmmmm... I think coming to work will take on a whole new meaning from now on.

I Think I Love You...Maybe

Forbes put out their list of Richest People in America today. Of course there were the sure in's like Bill Gates and Warren Buffett but one name surprised me, Mark Zuckerberg. He is the biggest gainer in percentage terms, he more than tripled his fortune to $6.9 billion. If you don't know who he is, take a look:

He's one of the co-founders of facebook. Who knew!?

Hey Mark, can I talk to you for a minute? How you doin? I want to congratulate you on making the Forbes Richest People In America list. Quite an accomplishment. Let's cut to the chase, I'm single and tired of working everyday. You're single and rich. See where I'm going with this? I know you have a girlfriend but let's face it, if you haven't married her by now, you probably won't.

If I'm going to be perfectly honest here, I'm not attracted to you physically but your almost 7 Billion dollars makes me take notice.

I think we should enter into a lucrative business agreement. You marry me and allow me to live the life of luxury and I will in turn turn the other cheek when you want to go out and indulge in a little extra curricular activities. Know what I mean? Deal?

Call me.

Tee

The Boobie Trap

Hey all. I stole that term from a fellow blogger "Naked With Socks On". I find it very appropriate for this discussion.

Ladies, I know we've all fallen victim to catching a man taking a "peek" at our "girls". You know, our breasts. When caught most guys will chuckle and look away embarrassed and apologize. Some will act indignant as thought they were well within their rights to stare, blatantly, at our girls.

Sometimes we women will act all upset and disrespected when we catch these men staring at us but my question to you ladies is this, are you REALLY upset when you find a man staring at your breasts? I'll admit that there are times when this is inappropriate and will make us feel very uncomfortable, say at a business meeting. But aside for those obvious situations how do you really feel when you catch a guy staring at the girls? When you are at the grocery store, or walking down the street, or at the night club, or grabbing lunch with your girlfriends, anything, and you see a guy staring, how do you really feel?

Most of the time I really don't care. Guys will look and there is nothing we can do about that. As long as he is not being all creepy about it and making lewd comments I could care less. One of my close besties says she gets very uncomfortable no matter what the situation is when a man stares at her girls.

What really gets me though are women that wear these tight blouses and very low cut shirts and wonders, "Why is he staring at me?"

To Believe or Not Believe

I was reading a blog post today and it struck a cord with me and now I have to post on it as well. Religion.

It's always been said that politics and religion are two subjects polite people don't really talk about in public especially in mixed company but dammit who ever said I was polite.

Let's talk for a minute people. I am a spiritual and religious person. I strongly believe in God and always will until the day I die. I know that my blessed life is all do to God. I've spent many of my early years in church.

As I've gotten older though, I've become a lot more rational and analytical in my thinking about everything actually. When I was young I had a definite and strong belief that there was an after life. I believed that after you leave this world you'd enter the hereafter, presumably Heaven. If you weren't a nice person then you would be cast into the fiery pits of Hell.

As I've gotten older I've come to realize something.....that makes no sense whatsoever. It just doesn't.

I believe that when you die you are just that, dead. You are in a permanent sleep and that is the end of it. No after life. No Heaven or Hell.

Now, I know some folks are going to say that there is an after life and that we do have a spirit that lives on and they've "seen" their loved one after they have crossed over. I was one of those people. I too thought my father spoke to me once after his death at a very pivotal time in my life. This is what I believe now, I think our subconscious gives us messages at certain times. mostly when we are sleep in the form of dreams. Sometimes, in those dreams we need to identify with an actual person in order to understand and receive those messages. At that time the message will then have someone we recognize, dead or alive so we actually believe that we are being "visited" by this person. I'm not sure if we have souls that live on or not. I'm just not sure.

Think about this....think about some of the dreams you've had in the past. Do you remember some of those dreams where there was a person involved but you could not see a face? Those are times when it wasn't necessary to use a person to relay that message to you at that time.

I could be way off base but these are just my thoughts I've come up with over the years. What are you thoughts or beliefs?

The Break Up Dance

As most of you know, I am trying my damnedest to move to Atlanta. I have my house on the market and just waiting on someone to bite. Speaking of which, anybody in the market to buy a house? Anybody? Whateves.

I am really anxious and focused on this move and I am chomping at the bit to get it under way. I feel I am in limbo. I can not take on any real long term commitments here because I would have to leave them whether it's 6 weeks from now or 6 months, I am leaving. For this reason I am not really trying to date anyone either. I do not, and I repeat, I do not want to complicate things by getting involved with anyone then have to either break his heart or heaven forbid get MY heart broken with the inevitable break up dance.

I was speaking to a guy associate the other day and he was trying to fix me up with his friend who he thinks I would be perfect for. Yeah right. First off, this associate of mine is really, really a gross little man. He is just disgusting. I get repulsed when I see him. With that said, I really don't hold out much hope that his friend would be any prize. Secondly, I told this associate that I was not looking to get into anything. He kept trying to convince me and I finally relented and said, "Look, if he is open to the idea of moving away in the near future then I may entertain the idea of meeting him." Whatevs.

I am so focused on trying to get things laid out so that my move goes smoothly whenever it happens. Life for me right now is really good save for the fact I miss my mother like crazy. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her and miss her. This was not supposed to happen to her but I digress. Besides all that crap, life is really good. I am tolerating my friends here in Baltimore OK, my job is going great although I am bored but that's neither here nor there. I am meeting new friends that I am hanging out with and loving it. My Mary Kay business is going along swimmingly. Things are really great and I am just biding my time so I am NOT willing to complicate all that with a relationship.

If I did find myself in a relationship and had to end it because I was moving, that would be an easy excuse to walk away because the guy would undoubtedly know that this was coming. Or I could end up like The Pioneer Woman who met her "Marlboro Man" just as she was planning her move away as well and he completely put a monkey wrench in those plans. That would never happen to me nor would I want that because my time in Baltimore is really done but whatever.

If you got involved with someone and you realized it had to end for whatever reason how would you do it? How would you enter into that break up dance with someone as to not totally decimate them, unless they deserved it of course?

Winner Winner Winner!!!

Aaaaaannnndddddd....the winner of the $25 Barnes and Noble gift cards is.........


Karen from Smiling Through It!!!


Congrats!!

Giveaways and Prizes and All That Stuff

I want to first congratulate Queen Size Funny Bone for winning the My Boys DVD giveaway!! Congrats Missy!!!

Now, Guess what? I have another giveaway! That's right my pumpkins, I have a $25 Barnes and Noble gift card for the lucky winner!!!! How cool is that?

All you have to do is write in my comments just how badly you want this card. Be creative. How badly do you want a $25 Barnes and Noble gift card?

The most creative and zany comment wins!!

Contest ends on Thursday, September 9th at 6:00 pm.

Alright my lovelies, get to commenting!

Love you long time.

Guess What??? I Have A Stupendious Giveaway!!!

For all of you that are TV fans I have a great giveaway for you. The 4th season of My Boys on TBS began July 25th and I was approached to offer you guys the My Boys DVD Season 2 and 3 pack as a prize!! How cool is that?

This is going to be very simple. All you have to do is tell me in the comments section below who your favorite character on My Boys is and why. The craftiest most awesome answer wins!

The contest ends on Sunday at 6:00pm so get those comments in!!

Good luck!

TBS provided The Diva's Random Thoughts My Boy's DVD gift-pack to give-away to my readers