Letter #1
Hi Tee,
So what do I do when I'm not sure who the father of my baby is, but I know it's NOT my current boyfriends? I slept with two men, one a one night stand, the other a few nights a month stand. Obviously I didn't use protection with either of them, and now I'm 2 months pregnant and don't know who the sperm donor was. I told my current boyfriend the truth. He's fixed and the timing would have been off, so I had to come clean immediately. He's cool with it, so cool that he doesn't want me to tell either other man involved that there is a possibility one of them could be this baby's father. My current boyfriend wants to take on all the responsibility. I'm not sure how I feel about that. Do they have a right to know?
What advice would you give me? My gut says to tell the two possible fathers the truth, but being that I know nothing about the, (nor really my current) I don't know what kind of stand up fathers they might be. Do I ditch them all and go solo on the whole thing? Or let my current boyfriend be the stand in dad for as long as we date, then tell the poss. fathers to be?
Signed:
Tangled Web I Weave
My Answer:
Dear Tangled Web,
Whoo! I must say you have an amazing boyfriend and I hope you recognize that before you lose him.
My advice to you is to definitely tell the two possible fathers. They have a right to now they have a child. Also, the child really need to know who they really are, not the pieces of a seemingly perfect life you put together for your own convenience. Another thing comes to mind, there could be some serious medical issues that come out later in life that would be tremendously helpful in knowing should they rear their ugly head. Your child has a right to full disclosure.
You are blessed in that your current boyfriend will remain apart of the child's life no matter what so its a win win for you. I would just advise you to not rob the child of knowing who they are by preventing them from knowing their father.
I hope this helps and good luck!
If you have a situation you need advice on, just click the graphic on the sidebar or go to ask.tee@hotmail.com.
