Thursday, December 27, 2007

Bittersweet Holiday

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday this week. I was off from work for a few days so its tough getting back to my routine. These few days off sure did go by fast! UGH! Oh well.

Christmas for me was bittersweet. It was busy in that I cooked the entire meal and hosted my family over at my house. For all of you that have hosted parties or gatherings you know what an undertaking that really is. Anyway, the meal came out really good. I was pleased about that. Everyone seemed to have had a really good time.

The holiday would have been perfect except The Analyst and I got into a huge fight. We have been fighting on and off for the last two weeks. It really sucks. I think we are pretty much over. How much does that suck to break up with your boyfriend on Christmas? That really blows.

It’s really hard this time because I really believed things would be different this go around. I believed he really wanted this relationship but we are not meant to be I don’t think. He is just too bitchy and whiny for me. All I get from him is bitching. He is truly worst then a woman.

We’ll see how this whole thing pans out. I want him out of my house because it is too painful to have to deal with him everyday. His attitude about things just tends to piss me off and I am constantly floating from anger to sadness to frustration to hopeful. He is confusing me by trying to be playful with me and still wanting to spend New Years together. How can I begin to put him behind me if he keeps doing this?

I wish I had never let him back into my life. I feel really foolish for believing in him again.

To top things off The Manager started texting me yesterday with a happy holiday wish. We talked on the phone for a little while and he claims he was going through a lot which caused him to disappear. He talked about how he missed me, yada, yada, yada. I am not sure of his real motive here. Why contact me now?

Men are the most irritating, frustrating creatures on this earth!!!